THE -SOCIAL Q'S- TAP : [ A ]

I UNDERSTAND that you feel aggrieved. But I don't think you're being reasonable here.

You may indeed fear exclusion, but I don't believe it's because two probably harried parents neglected to teach their children a second language in time for Christmas.

They are very young and probably not brilliant conversationalists in any language. What's really going on?

You rationalise your complaint, in part, by projecting fear onto the children. But why would they be frightened by friendly relatives when they have their parents and your husband to translate for them [ and for you too ]?

I have watched this dynamic with language barriers play out many times, and I have never witnessed a moment's trouble - much less heard charges of dereliction leveled at parents.

I suggest you learn a few expressions in the children's language and ask them to teach you some more, or stock up on puzzles and sticker books to play with them - the universal language of children.

And since I assume your deeper complaint here stems from some other facet of your relationship with your visitors, I urge you to discuss it with your husband, not to gripe about young children speaking their native language.